The presence of a potentially consuming tiredness and (one interpretation of) my disability led me to a fear of being useless, a lump asleep in the corner unable to do anything. I felt agitated and had the need to be constantly active, even when my petrol tank was bone dry. Having rests seemed to encourage uselessness! But then I overheard my fear and realised by running my tank to empty made me a lump asleep in the corner. My strategy was causing the thing I feared! Taking regular, sensible rests enables you to dry off a bit from the tiredness, fill up your petrol tank and therefore be useful.
Tuesday, 8 January 2013
Parkinson tiredness and the fear of being useless
There was nothing I experienced prior to the emergence of my symptoms that is like Parkinson tiredness. Have you ever been caught in the rain and gotten soaked, your clothes clinging to your skin? Parkinson tiredness is like having a personal rain cloud that drenches you with a tiredness that never dries out. As a result, initiating and controlling movement becomes more challenging. This is because with Parkinson’s good movement requires a large amount of energy and if the petrol in your tank is running low you cannot supply the energy needed. The petrol is also used up quicker when its low until you cannot resist falling asleep.