Sunday, 6 October 2013

To one side

I feel like a little corner of my world has unfolded like a tiny flower: when I think about Parkinson's I no longer get the overwhelming, anxious, despairing feeling that it will always be my dreaded companion and will eventually rob me of myself. Feelings can be changed by thought and I am free to think whatever I will about Parkinson’s.

It might be the stage I'm at in coming to terms with my diagnosis or the effectiveness of the medication but I no longer hold Parkinson's preciously, constantly in both hands; I can occasionally put it to one side, maybe for a few minutes. How will I best use this opportunity?

I finally see space beyond Parkinson’s that can be shaped and occupied by me. I want to use the tiny flower in my landscape to generate pollen that will help grow other tiny flowers in the lives of other sufferers. I want this opening up of understanding to be the legacy of my Parkinson’s. It is an expression beyond the confines of my disease and comes from the very heart of me. I want to write a book, a chronicle, of my journey to this point…

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