Being diagnosed with Parkinson’s is like sitting down and eating a big plate of pain. It has a grainy texture that sticks to your teeth and a sour, rotten taste that sometimes makes you vomit on yourself. The pain lays heavy like concrete on your stomach and the emotional wind that erupts from you is constant and powerful.
However, the human body (which crucially includes a mind) is remarkably
adaptable and can extract the beneficial from anything. For me, within my
Parkinson’s is also a painkiller because it makes me confront all aspects of
myself (including my stammer and depression). Parkinson’s has taught me to
appreciate the deep well of determination (some might say stubbornness!) I’ve
got, helped me see the benefit of having a stammer and depression (also being
chronic and incurable they taught me how to cope with Parkinson’s) and how much
I want to be me within my disease. I see
the value of the process of living a life and dealing with change since my
diagnosis. After years of pushing myself away because of my stammer, I simply
want to be me now; that includes Parkinson’s but also includes my intelligence
and my heart.
Parkinson’s has given me the pain but it has also given me a new perspective
and a new means to appreciate and deal with life.